The Beginning

Today my husband went back to work. So begins my first day alone with three kids. What an adventure. I keep thinking, "How am I ever going to do it alone?" But then I remind myself to stay calm and take it a little bit at a time. My little bit right now is that my 2 year old is down for a nap and I am listening to the twins grunt at each other. I am thankful for the weather today because I know I can send Joshua outside to play and that will occupy much of the afternoon. Though I know it will be hard on my husband, I am secretly hoping that he will be able to change his shift to deep nights, or 12 to 8, so he can be with me at night. Ever since he began his career as a policeman, I have dreamed of dinners together. I have settled with lunch and found a part-time job in the evenings. Partly to avoid nights without him. I never realized how much harder nights alone are than mornings. There always seems to be something to do in the mornings - grocery shopping, doctor's appointments, play dates, etc - that is almost impossible to do in the evenings.
Anyway, I have found several things to fill our schedules as a newly stay at home mom. First, library time is on Thursdays - that will be good for Joshua. Bible study is on Wednesdays - which will be good for me and Joshua. The MAC has toddler time on Mondays and Wednesdays. I find myself attempting to fill the schedule because my 2 year old has recently found the art of violence. My limited knowledge of preschool psychology leads me to believe it is caused by the babies and he is vying for attention. How do I deal with this? Well, for starters, I am filling the schedule. I have a hard time getting angry with him because I feel it is just in reaction to something I brought into his life. I just pray that daily he (and I) get more and more comfortable with the babies and make them a part of our lives.